I'm still alive, the heart's still beating
In fragments though for time is fleeting

The air's so sparse, I long for a breeze
For a vacuum lies in old memories

Why should then I grumble and groan?
My seeds of sorrow were already sown

The nasty laughs, the words of hurt
But foolish me, just kept inert

Nobody loved me, nobody cared
I cried alone when I should have flared

Their every word had made me cry
They looked at me as if I were to die

But that's a fact, that's very true
My time is less, moments are few

Moments of love that make me smile
Till I'd be gone for a very long while

Some memories still will always hide
My past and future will coincide

Past was the time before I slept
In the future, all my friends have wept

And praised a soul so holy and great
For I am dead, they bless my fate

And mourn over that tragic day
And say their dear friend passed away

All I got were tears right from my birth
Your sham tears are not that worth

My death is a journey to the Almighty
O God be just, I trust in thee

So I can't stay, death won't allow
And what's the use of crying now?

For life is a bait, to live is to die
But a condolence is the biggest lie.



The Story Behind

This poem is my feeling of angst against a society, my family, my friends and all those people who have never known my true worth. It is possible that they knew about it but never cared to let me know. May be they were just envious. But whatever may be the reason, a few sweet words of genuine appreciation or tender moments of love to show they care would have definitely helped me.

But, that was not to be. No one cared about me or my worth as a person both personally and professionally. That is no body ever appreciated my talent or my character as a person. Most have been ruthless, insensitive and rude enough to demean me or not acknowledge my presence. This poem is my taunt to those selfish people.

This poem states that condolence is the biggest lie. How true is that? If a person we love a lot dies, we are shocked, we cry for days and are depressed, but isn't all of this temporal? We cry for some time but then we gradually learn to forget and return to our daily normal lives with the tide of time. But when a person we don't even care about dies, do we really cry or feel sad? No we only have condolences to give. They simply are universal lies. Phrases like 'so sad' or 'may such a tragedy not befall on any one' or 'he was a really good person or 'God, let his soul rest in peace' are all a part of those condolences. A person who condoles never really cries himself. Those are just false assurances that one can offer or a few sham tears perhaps but nothing more than that.

How ironic is that! In my case, the poem says when I was alive, no body recognized my true caliber but now that I am dead, they praise me, pray for my soul to rest in peace and shed a few crocodile tears. And as usual, a few false words of assurance: condolence. The poet says here, that I never got anything as expected from this wretched society when I was alive. I don't expect anything after my death. However, the last thing that I really need is a condolence.